RFK Jr faces call for investigation into claim he chainsawed whale’s head off - eviltoast

His independent White House campaign has fizzled, but the flow of bizarre stories of Robert F Kennedy Jr’s unorthodox handling of the carcasses of wild mammals has experienced no similar suspension.

An environmental group is calling for a federal investigation into the former presidential candidate for an episode in which he allegedly severed the head of a washed-up whale with a chainsaw – and drove home with it strapped to his car’s roof.

The episode has parallels with another extraordinary tale reported earlier in August in which Kennedy confessed to dumping a dead bear cub in New York’s Central Park and attempted to make it look like the animal was killed by a bicyclist.

The latest grisly revelation, about the whale head, is not particularly new – it stems from a 2012 interview Kennedy’s daughter Kick gave to Town & Country magazine, in which she talks about a visit to other family members of the political dynasty in Hyannis Port, Massachusetts, more than two decades prior.

  • some_guy@lemmy.sdf.org
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    3 months ago

    His daughter:

    “Every time we accelerated on the highway, whale juice would pour into the windows of the car, and it was the rankest thing on the planet. We all had plastic bags over our heads with mouth holes cut out, and people on the highway were giving us the finger, but that was just normal day to day stuff for us.”

    • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
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      3 months ago

      Note that he intentionally took his kids to watch him saw the head off and put it on the car and take it home. Because he apparently liked to “study” such things. Weird as fuck.

      • floofloof@lemmy.ca
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        3 months ago

        All his life he has spent an unusual amount of time around animal corpses. Dead animals are kind of his thing.

    • N0body@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      3 months ago

      Just a not weird family drive through the country. Seriously though, I’m betting the Harris campaign is sitting on several more of these stories that will roll out over the next couple months.

      I’m also wondering where his collection is right now. If he’s being investigated for a federal crime, there may be a search warrant in the works.

      • IamSparticles@lemmy.zip
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        3 months ago

        Look, guys… he already admitted that he’s not a choir boy. So just drop it, already. Sheesh. /s

          • tacosplease@lemmy.world
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            3 months ago

            There’s not always the little strip of metal across the top of the door. Some cars just let the glass press against a foam rubber seal when the door is shut. Infiniti G35 windows were like that.

            • Duamerthrax@lemmy.world
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              3 months ago

              You can still close the windows on the straps, assuming they’re flat straps.

              I’ve personally seen too many people try strapping things to their car through open windows because they didn’t plan on how they would get into their cars. It’s far too likely that mr. brain worms simply strapped the doors shut and crawled in through the windows.

            • GBU_28@lemm.ee
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              3 months ago

              And then the load shifts on the roof, and you get in. How will you tighten the straps?

              Why not just run the straps around with the doors open

              • curbstickle@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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                3 months ago

                Generally there are more than two windows…

                But I never said any of this was a good idea, just answering how you can do it. Some car doors won’t close with a strap in there (my old Chrysler Lebaron for example, $800 of “Its technically driveable”), so me and a friend went in through the windows.

                I had town car, all four doors would close just fine, but the station wagon only the front doors would close (so backseat meant crawling through the trunk, aka the fifth seat).

                You do what you gotta do

      • Dhar@lemmy.ca
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        3 months ago

        Normal Kennedy day. They only roll the windows up when things get weird.

      • catloaf@lemm.ee
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        3 months ago

        Based on what I’m hearing about the guy, I wouldn’t be surprised if the windows and/or AC were broken and they just left it like that.

    • Duamerthrax@lemmy.world
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      3 months ago

      people on the highway were giving us the finger, but that was just normal day to day stuff for us.

      Right, so when they’re not driving around with whale heads, he’s just a reckless driver. Must run in the family.

    • nova_ad_vitum@lemmy.ca
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      3 months ago

      Remember folks, there are delusional centrists who love this guy and think he speaks for the working man.

  • mycodesucks@lemmy.world
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    3 months ago

    RFK Jr: “This is a cool story, right? People will think I’m cool?”

    Brain Worm: “Yes! Yes! And tell them about the bear!”

    • Chaotic Entropy@feddit.uk
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      3 months ago

      Beautiful. If Kirsty Noem taught us anything, it’s that charming stories about animals are all the rage.

  • magnetosphere@fedia.io
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    3 months ago

    Okay, but if it was already dead, and he didn’t kill it, what’s the big deal?

    “Mr Kennedy’s apparent transport of the marine mammal skull from Massachusetts to New York, and therefore across state lines, also represented a felony violation of the Lacey Act, one of the earliest wildlife conservation laws enacted by [the] United States in 1900,” he wrote, adding that it was also illegal to possess part of any animal protected by the endangered species act.

    Oh.

    • BarqsHasBite@lemmy.world
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      3 months ago

      I think the purpose of that language is to prevent people hunters claiming they just happened to find it dead.

      • superkret@feddit.org
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        3 months ago

        I hate when actions that cause no harm are made illegal, just because actions that do cause harm are harder to investigate.

      • shalafi@lemmy.world
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        3 months ago

        Yep! Everyone on lemmy acting like this guy harpooned the thing himself. Technically illegal? Sure. But not the sort of thing that’s usually prosecuted unless some sort of public attention is drawn.

        • Chaotic Entropy@feddit.uk
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          3 months ago

          Just to be clear though… whether the things he is doing are technically illegal or not… they’re batshit insane. This privileged socialite just running around the US bagging himself any carcasses that aren’t nailed down, transporting them large distances, and sometimes dumping them in places…

    • zaph@sh.itjust.works
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      3 months ago

      Maybe I was lied to in boy scouts but I was told that law even prevents you from keeping a feather naturally dropped by a bald eagle. So cutting the head off an endangered animal would definitely be a no no.

      • anon6789@lemmy.world
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        3 months ago

        All feathers are illegal, but they will most certainly throw the book at you for Eagle feathers. The animal rescues have to transport dead bald eagles to the federal government where they get DNA tested and cataloged and feathers are only distributed to Native Americans who have gone through a permit process. A first time offense is a $100k fine and a year in prison.

        Bald and Golden Eagle Protection Act

        Handling and Distribution of Bald and Golden Eagles and Parts

        This is exactly as mentioned in other comments, to prevent the “it was already dead when I got here” excuse.

          • anon6789@lemmy.world
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            3 months ago

            Of course! Learning all the crazy laws and regulations is one of my favorite things about visiting rescues.

            My favorite legal eagle story is the park near my work had a rescue Bald Eagle that died. I was talking to the caretaker about it, and he told me about the shipping process and the DNA cataloging, and he said the eagle was currently in the freezer to keep it intact for eventual shipping once he received instructions. He told me that was nothing though, he also has another eagle he found in a field from 10 years ago in the freezer with it. It was determined it died of avian influenza (bird flu), so the carcass is banned from leaving its local quarantine zone. At the same time, it’s a federal crime for him to bury it, burn it, etc. So it’s been chilling on ice for a decade awaiting federal intructions. Wild stuff!

        • BarqsHasBite@lemmy.world
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          3 months ago

          What’s so special about bald eagle feathers that people want them? Not quite the trophy hunting that I normally think of.

          • anon6789@lemmy.world
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            3 months ago

            There are a lot of reasons for these laws existing, though many will seem odd now since it’s something that has been extremely illegal for about a century now.

            Native people have string cultural tradition in which Eagle feathers and others are important. While they are the only ones allowed to possess them, it’s only after a very extensive process. People are willing to pay ridiculous money to “jump the line.”

            When the time these laws were passed, art and fashion used feathers and animal skins. The flashier or more amazing the animals, the more parts were worth. Raptors especially, being apex animals, don’t reproduce very quickly, and it is very easy to hurt their populations, and as they are the biggest, baddest birds, their feathers are top choice. Talons were also in demand, again, because they are pretty awesome.

            People also just used to collect weird stuff, including dead animals. Tour the house of a rich person from the 1700s or 1800s house and you will likely find all manner of dead animals. These people did the same thing as people do online now. They wanted to look more awesome than everyone else in their social circle. Looking like a fancy biologist, explorer, or hunter made you seem interesting, and all you had to do is kill something fancy looking, or pay someone to do it for you.

            Here are 2 news stories for you. The first is still going on from this year. Two men killed at least 3600 birds for profit in 6 years. That’s just 2 people.

            In the second story, it is people and businesses selling animal parts from all over the world. It’s like shark fins, elephant tusks, pangolin scales, and so on. They’re rare, and people will pay.

            Man pleads guilty in eagle ‘killing spree’ on reservation to sell feathers on black market

            A Washington state man accused of helping kill thousands of birds pleaded guilty in federal court on Wednesday to shooting eagles on an American Indian reservation in Montana and selling their feathers and body parts on the black market.

            Branson and a second defendant, Simon Paul, killed approximately 3,600 birds, including eagles on the Flathead reservation and elsewhere, according to a December indictment.

            Federally recognized tribes can apply for permits with the U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service to take a bald or golden eagle for religious purposes, and enrolled tribal members can apply for feathers and other bird parts from the National Eagle Repository in Colorado and non-government repositories in Oklahoma and Phoenix. There’s a yearslong backlog of requests at the National Repository and researchers say the high demand is fueling the black market for eagle parts.

            17 people, 2 pawn shops sentenced in eagle trafficking case

            Parsons’ office said the operation used undercover techniques to buy protected bird parts from 51 suspects over 19 months. Authorities said the purchases happened over the internet and in Iowa, Montana, Nebraska, South Dakota and Wyoming.

            Edward Grace, acting assistant director of the Office of Law Enforcement for the U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service, said in the statement that agents and forensic scientists found more than 35 bird species — spanning every continent but Antarctica — had been trafficked.

            “This operation, which began in America’s heartland, illustrates how wildlife trafficking is a global crisis,” Grace said.

  • Zorsith@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    3 months ago

    Are we sure John McAfee didn’t fake his death and change his name to RFK? Cause this is some weird-ass John McAfee shit.

  • randon31415@lemmy.world
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    3 months ago

    Trump: “People are calling us weird! Quick, bring on someone that is weirder than me and Vance!”

    Staffers: “Turn on the RFK signal!”

    • Yprum@lemmy.world
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      3 months ago

      It was already tough being in a world where it’s hard to see the difference between the onion articles and actual news. Now we’re on a completely new level where news can be the result of playing CAH. It’s kinda funny until you stop to think how terrible it is.

  • Hydra_Fk@reddthat.com
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    3 months ago

    Little know fact. A worm crawled into his skull and ate a piece of his brain. The brain then died, and that’s RFK JR.

    • anon6789@lemmy.world
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      3 months ago

      Her actual name is Kathleen.

      She’s named after her great aunt Kathleen Kennedy, who died in a plane crash at 28 years old. Aunt Kathleen was nicknamed “Kick” because of her “irrepressible nature” and it seems she inherited the nickname as well.

  • Technofrood@feddit.uk
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    3 months ago

    I know the meme is Ted Cruz being the Zodiac killer, but are we sure it isn’t actually RFK Jr?

    • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
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      3 months ago

      Wrong coast. But considering the family said that he likes to “study” things like whale skulls, I wouldn’t exactly be shocked if he had a human skull or two in his collection.

        • hate2bme@lemmy.world
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          3 months ago

          Tried to give the show a listen. Couldn’t get passed the terrible jokes and laughing and turned it off in less than 5 minutes. Any recommendations on a more serious show like Behind the Bastards?

  • Rottcodd@lemmy.world
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    3 months ago

    So the unspoken bit about RFK Jr. is that he’s a tweaker, right?

    I mean, the details are all in the context of politically entitled progeny, but the underlying vibe I get from the stories about him is very reminiscent of the tweakers I’ve known over the years.

    • vaultdweller013@sh.itjust.works
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      3 months ago

      Watch the Behind the Bastards on him, he at least used to be really into drugs even got one of his brothers addicted.

      Edit: Pretty sure it was the brother that died from a drug overdose.

    • Num10ck@lemmy.world
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      3 months ago

      how much would a whale head weigh? how would he have raised it onto his car roof without an engine lift and crazy chains? maybe it was a really small whale? why would the windows be open?