Would you take a cheap and effective once-a-day anti-aging pill? What if it were a suppository? - eviltoast

You can assume that for every day you take the pill you don’t age that day - if you skip it for a day you age by a day.

  • Blake [he/him]@feddit.uk
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    1 year ago

    Yes, probably. I also really enjoy the idea that you think that it being a suppository would factor in to the calculus at all, I think it’s really funny

    Fellas, is it gay to put immortality up your ass?

    • PeachMan@lemmy.one
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      1 year ago

      The mildly homophobic nature of the question is hilarious. “Would you want to live forever if you also had to be a little bit gay???”

      • Blake [he/him]@feddit.uk
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        1 year ago

        It’s not even slightly gay to use a suppository either, it reminds me of the guys who think it’s gay to clean their ass because it’s gay to touch an asshole.

        • lars@lemmy.world
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          1 year ago

          I don’t have anything against the straights. I’m not a heterophobe – I’m a real cool dude — but when those people talk about not washing their asses, it’s only natural for us to feel a little bit of heterophobia against their lifestyle.

          • lightnsfw@reddthat.com
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            1 year ago

            Please don’t lump us in with those people. That’s not a “hetero” thing it’s just a disgusting person thing.

          • PeachMan@lemmy.one
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            1 year ago

            That’s not heterophobia, that’s just being horrified by ignorant bigots that are also hetero.

        • TheAnonymouseJoker@lemmy.ml
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          1 year ago

          People who do not wash their asses and genitals are greasy basement bozos. I do not care about their gender or other credentials.

      • Trainguyrom@reddthat.com
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        1 year ago

        See, I’ll go out on a limb and say it’s not gay for a man to engage in prostate play. Even having sex with another man isn’t necessarily gay!

    • Ryantific_theory@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      Yeah, I’d be uncomfortable, but immortality is immortality.

      Now, if the requirement was a daily barebacking by the ultra-rich engineering their cum to be the elixir of immortality, I’d be a little more conflicted.

  • BaumGeist@lemmy.ml
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    1 year ago

    What kind of horseshit twist is that? Are you literally 14, OP? “There’s an immortality pill, but OH NOES 😱 it goes in your BUTT 💀💀💀!!!” Have you considered writing for Black Mirror?

    I’m taking it even if it’s the size of a horsecock, regardless of which hole it goes in.

    • Mak'@pawb.social
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      1 year ago

      The same kind of people who don’t wash their ass because they think it would make them gay.

    • MJBrune@beehaw.org
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      1 year ago

      People think suppository is a 4 letter word. “Oh put something in my colon for immortality?! Never!” Honestly the world would be best without that sort of thinking.

      • morgan423@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        I honestly think ending aging would be a boon for society. Because the death rate will plummet to accidental deaths, suicides, and homicides only, which are a tiny fraction of total overall deaths.

        Therefore overpopulation is going to very quickly motivate world society to get its collective shit together to solve the nagging problems that have been holding us back, and encourage expansion into the rest of the solar system. Because if the issues weren’t solved, even the wealthy elite would be threatened.

        • Pantherina@feddit.de
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          1 year ago

          Haha very optimistic. Like overpopulation currently causing “untolerable illegal immigrant waves” causes people to reduce their CO2 footprint, share their homes and all.

          Hell, please no more old people. Many are nice, but no way. There is a reason politics made by old people doesnt work

  • Bell@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    Um hell yes. And if it were a suppository, we’d all quickly get used to some butthole time every morning

  • fubo@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    Even those of us who don’t enjoy putting things up our butts eventually get used to doing it anyway. It’s just another body part.

    (Folks, if your butthole hurts, go to the doctor already. Hemorrhoids, anal fissures, and other butthole problems are quite treatable. Don’t let them get worse.)

  • ryan@the.coolest.zone
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    1 year ago

    Sign me up. Even if there’s side effects like nausea or whatever. I’ll do whatever it takes to stop my bones hurting more every year.

      • ryan@the.coolest.zone
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        1 year ago

        I’m 34. Yes, my bones hurt, but it’s not terrible and I’d rather stay 34 forever (or at least drastically slow my aging, like if there were serious side effects I could take one every two days and effectively double my longevity).

      • tooclose104@lemmy.ca
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        1 year ago

        I’ll be my age forever, perfectly ok with that. Make taking the bum pill part of a daily exercise routine.