How many eggs for that tessera? - eviltoast
  • kaotic@lemmy.world
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    1 day ago

    Billionaires have no idea how the majority of us are living. We shouldn’t allow people this disconnected from a normal everyday life to run the country.

  • jabeez@lemmy.today
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    1 day ago

    Jebus, didn’t realize the muskrat was so big, Fatputin isn’t a small guy and he looks quite a bit smaller. So, guess he’s a bigger piece of shit than I even knew!

      • jabeez@lemmy.today
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        24 hours ago

        Huh, wild, did assume it was camera angle at first, but they’re both right next to car, which is angled just slightly so muskrat is a little bit closer, but not enough to skew perspective that much, or so I thought. Hmmmm, X-lifts perhaps?

    • Echo Dot@feddit.uk
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      1 day ago

      Given that he managed to bankrupt a casino I’m positive his career as a car salesman would be highly comedic.

  • callouscomic@lemm.ee
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    2 days ago

    They literally just notified 32% of the Department of Education last night that they were being fired.

    Fuck these assholes and anyone who voted for them can fucking drop dead.

    • gandalf_der_12te@discuss.tchncs.de
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      1 day ago

      i mean, who needs Education anyways? in the future, when machines take all the jobs, there’s no point in having an educated workforce. so better cut down on that money that schools are spending today. (/s)

      • Echo Dot@feddit.uk
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        1 day ago

        I can’t wait until the ultimate karma when they try and actually replace everyone with AI and it all fucks up. Everyone who is ever tried to do that is always ended up in trouble.

  • pinheadednightmare@lemm.ee
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    1 day ago

    Musk looks like that bully that’s just waiting to sucker punch Trump if he fucks up the lines he was given. He’s even clenching his teeth.

  • MuskyMelon@lemmy.world
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    1 day ago

    Come on cuntservatives! Buy an EV like your king commands but look like a tree-hugging pussy or don’t buy an EV and be a traitor to your king!

    Which will it be?

  • MountingSuspicion@reddthat.com
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    2 days ago

    This looks like an SNL sketch. People keep expressing sympathy for the onion writers, but really, how does one even parody this? Just shot for shot, word for word something a satirist would come up with.

    • Goodmorningsunshine@lemmy.world
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      1 day ago

      I figure The Onion just has to full on go the opposite direction.

      -Trump Returns Funds to Ukraine: Turns Back on Russia.

      -Functioning Government Returns to the United States

      -Democrats Embrace The Left

      Headlines no one could believe and stories about things basically working like they should.

    • Zron@lemmy.world
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      2 days ago

      50 years ago, the president advertising a product probably would have lead to investigations

      Now it barely makes the evening news.

    • hOrni@lemmy.world
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      2 days ago

      This is basically what killed South Park in 2016. Trump became president and you can’t even parody that, because You can’t think of anything more absurd. Except maybe electing him for a second time.

    • HeyJoe@lemmy.world
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      2 days ago

      Honestly, every time I see an SNL skit recently that mimics one of the latest events I keep saying this is sad because as crazy as they get, I feel like the real event was so much crazier. The skits just make me sad because I’m just being reminded of how fucked we are.

    • Hudell@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      1 day ago

      (ChatGPT story)

      Americans Celebrate Having One Regular Day, Say It’s “Exactly What They Needed”

      New York, NY — In an unprecedented turn of events, Americans across the country are celebrating what they are calling “the most normal, regular day in recent memory,” marking a significant break from the chaotic, unpredictable rollercoaster of modern life.

      “It’s honestly been a while since I’ve had a day like this,” said Karen Thompson, 42, of Dayton, Ohio, who reported that her Tuesday included nothing more than answering a few emails, picking up groceries, and getting a slightly-too-hot coffee at her local Starbucks. “I didn’t get any bad news. No surprise work projects. I even made it through traffic without being rear-ended by a guy in a Dodge Ram. It was a good day. I’m feeling rejuvenated.”

      In cities from coast to coast, Americans woke up to the kind of day they hadn’t experienced in months: no major scandals, no worldwide crises, no seismic shifts in public opinion. For once, the news cycle wasn’t dominated by geopolitical unrest or trending hashtags. In fact, the only noteworthy event was that the Wi-Fi went out for about 15 minutes — and even then, no one freaked out.

      “I haven’t had a day this uneventful since… I don’t even remember,” said Jack Morris, 29, from Austin, Texas. “I didn’t even get an email with ‘urgent’ in the subject line. I was able to enjoy lunch without my coworker telling me they’ve started a podcast. It was just me and my turkey sandwich, and honestly, it was great.”

      At a press conference held to commemorate the event, a spokesperson for the National Association of Regular Days (NARD) explained that the organization was “thrilled” to see this rare occurrence of calm, adding that they hope it signals the beginning of a new era of moderation.

      “The public has long been craving a moment to just breathe,” the spokesperson said. “We’re seeing a nationwide trend of people taking an actual break from the chaotic ‘always on’ mentality. It’s almost as if they’re starting to realize… hey, maybe a day of normalcy isn’t so bad after all.”

      While some have expressed concerns that this “regular day” could be the result of a political conspiracy or an alien invasion disguised as mundane life, the overall mood across the nation remains overwhelmingly positive. Social media has been flooded with #OneRegularDay memes, with people praising the “non-urgent vibe” of the day.

      “It’s been great,” said social media influencer Mia Stewart, 23. “No pressure to be perfect, no need to overshare every moment of my life — just a regular day. So glad we could all experience it together. Honestly, I think I might do it again tomorrow.”

      At press time, the news cycle had already shifted back to unpredictable chaos, but Americans remained hopeful that a few more normal days might be just around the corner.

    • Evil_Shrubbery@lemm.ee
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      2 days ago

      This looks like an SNL sketch.

      Ohh, I kept waiting for something funny to happen, but now I get it - it won’t.
      :D

    • Ledericas@lemm.ee
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      2 days ago

      SNL have been getting alot it lately with all the material they are getting from trump admin.