Clown Country
Stolidus
- It sounds strong and powerful
- It’s Latin, and therefore properly awesome.
- It’s definition is: foolish, absurd, dumb, forceless, powerless
Listen. I know you said no wrong answers but unfortunately due to the past few decades of the American Political system, pretty much anything is now effectively accurate. Even such things as:
- The Divided States of America
- McMilitary Industrial Complex
- The Paycheck-to-Paycheck Republic
- Red vs Blue
- Gilded Ruins
- AmeriKKKa
- Walmartistan
- Gunlandia
- Yeehaw Reich
- Methlehem
- Debtlandia
- Live, Laugh, Lawsuit
Brawndoland
Bonerland
Serious answer: the Viking settlers named the land “Vinland” long before Columbus was even born. That name is of Germanic origin, same as the English language, and would be appropriate for settlers of Germanic origin (England, Germany, etc.)
Alternatively, a name in the Native American language would be most appropriate given that they were the original inhabitants of the land.
united states of fuck you, i got mine.
South Canada
Shitstain
Turtle Island
Hey now, I’m feeling attacked!
To the top with you
ing
“All hail the ing of ing! The land without a KKKing!”
Greenland… ing
Japaning
Australiaing
Taiwaning
Uniteding Kingingdoming
Congoing
…and Chinaahhuh… …was once a great, uhh, eM, -ing but they lost their way to our holey grate ing-dumb…
- “ing out”
“Now gather all ing suffixes and affixes to kiss the holy kock ring. Don’t be shyyy.”Given the religious fervor throughout its history, how about naming it after an ancient biblical region?
Transjordan?
Wait. Shit, that won’t work, even Jordan’s gone woke. Maybe something else in the region?
OH! How about Gilead!?
Except Transjordan isn’t biblical. It’s the region of Palestine that became The Kingdom of Jordan. As opposed to Cisjordan, which is the region that became Israel and the present Palestine.
But I don’t think we’re allowed to say cis anymore. /s
Except Transjordan isn’t biblical
I know, but when I Googled to confirm the name of the country in Handmaid’s Tale, I noticed the real Gilead was in Transjordan, saw a joke opportunity sitting there, and that was the smoothest I could work it in. I’m open to workshopping it.
Trade names with the Gulf and become the United States of Mexico.
A not-insignificant amount of the USA was Mexico, at one time.
There’s nothing united about it, other than maybe hatred towards minorities
New New Mexico and Old New Mexico
United States of Lee (after General Robert Lee)
New motto
All For Me and None For Thee
Hey now - why go with Lee when you could go with Forrest and celebrate the first leader of the KKK.
Also, much better statutes.
Never fight uphill, me boys!
Dumbfuckistan
