Games are too WOKE these days! [PS1 startup sound] - eviltoast
  • rustyfish@lemmy.world
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    9 months ago

    Fallout: The solution for the energy crisis is being held back by higher ups for pRoFiTs. WW3 goes hot. Everything gets nuked.

    Horizon Zero Dawn: Dumbass techbro is responsible for killing everything on the planet down to the last microbe. Continues with a cultural genocide by deleting all of recorded history in the bunkers. Because he can and he is a dumbass.

    Bioshock: A super capitalists wet dream goes plopp. Killing a shit ton of innocent people. (Possibly starting a nuclear war)

    Oddworld: Unhinged capitalism destroying nature and enslaving the worlds inhabitants.

    Cookie Clicker: Monopoly on cookies turn the whole universe (and possibly every other universe) into cookie matter. Everybody plays along because cookies taste nice.

    Please tell me more about how politics in video games ruin video games.

    Edit Bonusround:

    Factorio: Uncaring, industrial alien crash lands on planet. Starts terraforming it, plunders its resources, poisons its earth, water and sky. Slaughters every kind of resistance from the planets natives.

    • Ms. ArmoredThirteen@lemmy.ml
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      9 months ago

      Morrowind: Several factions competing for power try and use the player as a way to get on top without getting their own hands dirty. Half the main quest line is running around doing mundane stuff that has less to do with proving you’re a chosen one and more to do with proving you’re a good little bootlicker who won’t disrupt the status quo when they hand you the glove of god slapping.

      • Bytemeister@lemmy.world
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        9 months ago

        Or… You do a shit-ton of skooma and mushroom juice, suplex Vivec’s harlequin ass and fight Dagoth-Ur buck naked, screaming like a banshee and then break all his toys with that hammer that burns when you hold it.

      • mellowheat@suppo.fi
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        9 months ago

        Skyrim: fascist faction backed or controlled up by xenophobic elves battles a fascist faction of xenophobic humans for ruling the northern part of the world. A viking-like dragon/warrior comes up and fixes everything by yelling louder than anyone else.

    • PugJesus@kbin.socialOP
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      9 months ago

      Oddworld: Unhinged capitalism destroying nature and enslaving the worlds inhabitants.

      “What do you mean the unhinged capitalist caricatures are making fun of capitalism’s drive for profit leading to self-cannibalizing processes??”

      For some people, even ‘unsubtle’ isn’t enough.

    • Cowbee [he/him]@lemmy.ml
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      9 months ago

      Fallout goes way further than that.

      At every single opportunity, Bourgeoisie are depicted as monstrously evil. Even their most competent, Mr. House, is an unfeeling sociopath who begins the game as a failure for you to clean up after. Every pre-war corporation is disgustingly evil, and nearly every post-war Capitalist is also a monster.

      The games also favorably depict Socialist constructs, like the Syndicalist Gun Runners, the Anarcho-Communist Followers of the Apocalypse, and more.

      It’s not even close to subtle about its messaging, yet chuds still think it’s a right-wing game because it satirist the Red Scare, but they take it as straight messaging.

      • UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world
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        9 months ago

        Religious Aliens are actually incredibly based, because they have launched a glorious crusade against the fascist chuds of the USMC who get caught with their pants down doing an ethnic cleansing of frontier planets in rebellion.

    • pyrflie@lemm.ee
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      9 months ago

      Universal Paperclips: dumb AI wipes out humanity with mindcontrol marketing so it can turn the universe into paperclips.

  • Deway@lemmy.world
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    9 months ago

    Jokes on you, inmay favorite Final Fantasy you’re a mercenary trying to prevent an evil witch from the future from destroying time itself.

      • AngryCommieKender@lemmy.world
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        9 months ago

        Sphere Grid was absolutely broken and I loved it. I stole a ton of Key Spheres from Biran and Yenke, and unlocked Demi for everyone in the party, cause I also had stockpiled Warp Spheres. The entire party became magic users at that point

        • rustydrd@sh.itjust.works
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          9 months ago

          Sphere Grid was FFX though (and I loved it too). The junction system in FF8 had you “drawing” magic from monsters and certain points in the game world, which you could then couple with your characters’ attributes to make them stronger. It was an interesting idea but also felt wonky, because it made not using magic the optimal way to play.

          • VindictiveJudge@lemmy.world
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            9 months ago

            Perhaps a cap on the amount of magic you can junction to a stat with the cap going up based on character level would improve things?

      • Donjuanme@lemmy.world
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        9 months ago

        I had 0 problem with junctioning, and I loved that level scaling meant a much more open world. It’s not like the magic you drew (and junctioned) didn’t also go up as the enemies level did.

        Ff8 was the best, most complete, final fantasy, besides the bat shit story (which I want to see expanded so much)

        • Rodeo@lemmy.ca
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          9 months ago

          I don’t think I ever got past the first disc because you can break the game almost immediately. I can’t remember what the details are, but you draw 99 of some spells and it gives you a 99% chance to hit, so then you can just spam sleep or confuse or whatever and cheese every battle.

          Once I figured that out I lost any interest. “Oh look, I’m instantly the most powerful thing around by far, and the game has barely started.” The whole appeal of those games for me is watching your power grow.

      • hakase@lemm.ee
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        9 months ago

        The only problem with the junction system is the boosts you get on level-up that incentivize under levelling until late-game. Other than that it’s perfect.

      • ReeferPirate@lemy.lol
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        9 months ago

        Hard disagree. The junction system is what made FF8 amazing. Gives you an insane amount of freedom on how to build your team.

    • Zozano@lemy.lol
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      9 months ago

      Jokes on you, in my favourite Final Fantasy, you’re a dream, trying to stop your dad from killing your hyper religious, brainwashed girlfriend who needs to dance whenever dad commits genocide.

      • curiousaur@reddthat.com
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        9 months ago

        The description from the wiki is so good.

        Avalanche [note 1] is an organization in the Final Fantasy VII universe. It is an eco-terrorist insurgent group seeking to save the planet from the misuse of mako energy and opposing the actions of the Shinra Electric Power Company.

    • UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world
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      9 months ago

      Once you plug your brain into the YouTube / AM Radio vomit cannon, it obliterates all the brain cells you once used for critical thinking.

    • psmgx@lemmy.world
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      9 months ago

      Yeah more or less. You’re a radical earth preservation group blowing up what are essentially nuclear reactors. You dress in drag for one level to sneak into a mob boss’ HQ, and you have a casino’s fursona as an optional character. Social justice, preservation of the earth, and how corporations and the military exploit people are explicit themes.

      There is also sword fights on motorcycles, skiing, and aliens.

    • PugJesus@kbin.socialOP
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      Some points are overemphasized (there’s only one drag scene, and how furry the furry party member is is debatable, as seen with other commenters here), but it’s basically true. You play as a multiethnic group of ecoterrorists seeking to overthrow an evil worldwide corporation sucking the world dry in the name of profit.

  • siban@lemmy.world
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    9 months ago

    Jokes on you, in my favorit final fantasy game you fight the remnants of an old post scarcity society that made a small upsido that nearly destroyed all life in the universe.

  • HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world
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    9 months ago

    My favorite FF is a hallucination after you get stabbed with magic because you tried to overthrow the government. But it has a children’s card game!

  • BlanketsWithSmallpox@lemmy.world
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    9 months ago

    … now if only you left off Final Fantasy and Shinra…

    This could be so many JRPGs. Including other Final Fantasies… 6 is damn close too. And the superior of all the Final Fantasies…

    6, 9, 13-2. Fight me.

    • mods_are_assholes@lemmy.world
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      9, 6, 10.

      Everything after X-2 is an abomination and I refuse to acknowledge it is even the same franchise.

      I will fite you

        • mods_are_assholes@lemmy.world
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          If it isn’t turn-based, I’m not playing it. No idea who the fuck thought it was pivot literally the MOST ICONIC turn based IP into action combat but I want to scoop their eyes out with grapefruit spoon.

          To honor your engagement, I’ll watch a walkthrough, but I’m serious about how unbelievably, incandescently fuckdamn bitter I am that FF dropped turn-based combat in favor of MMO inspired action.

          And that goes double for the FF7 remake that I have literally waited decades for.

          At this point, Fuck Square. Seriously. Fuck them hard. There are already TONS of action adventures out there, why did they have to do this to my favorite turn based?

          • BlanketsWithSmallpox@lemmy.world
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            9 months ago

            Why not just play Indie then? Same pixel base, same classic combat style. Pixel Remasters are a thing too if you’re looking for nostalgia instead.

            It’s not like Squenix IP was special between FF iterations. Maybe a chocobo, moogle, and cactuar, but otherwise fairly different contexts in most titles.

            Hell one of the few things Pokemon gets shit on still for is being turn based.

            https://gamerant.com/best-turn-based-jrpgs-stories/

            • mods_are_assholes@lemmy.world
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              9 months ago

              Why not just play Indie then?

              What makes you think I don’t? I am specifically referring to the asstastic turn that the Final Fantasy series made after X-2, and dropping turn based combat is only part of it.

              Hell one of the few things Pokemon gets shit on still for is being turn based.

              Yes, because people in general are fucking idiots who have no idea and just like to hear their voices.

              Turn based will always be the superior option in RPGs and most tactical games. Whoever started the ‘shitting on turn based’ trend needs to be fed to a woodchipper.

  • Droechai@lemm.ee
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    9 months ago

    Which one is this? I’ve only played Tactics on GBA and FF3 on the DS but your version sounds awesome

        • Sprawlie@lemmy.world
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          I just finished that segment. Wasn’t sure how they’d translate it to the remake (I’ve lived under a rock to avoid any spoilers / controversy)

          I was in tears laughing so hard I had to do it 3 times. glorious. They went HARD

      • Wooster@startrek.website
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        9 months ago

        Oh Tactics is such an underrated masterpiece. I really hope we get that rumored remaster soon. 3/6 is also amazing, super easy, but so well designed.

        • Th3D3k0y@lemmy.world
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          9 months ago

          Me: I’m here at the tower, I can save the world from kefka!

          Kefka: imma charging my lasa beems

      • Droechai@lemm.ee
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        9 months ago

        Thanks :) I’ve heard a lot of good things about 7 and I quite liked liked the advent children movie but didn’t recognize your original description. I guess I just have to play it.

        Tactics is almost a comfort game by now for me, it’s so good

        Edit: I think the FF3 for DS is a japanese FF3 remake though, it’d quite basic and punishing but worth a play through. The DS graphics where enjoyable

        • Wooster@startrek.website
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          9 months ago

          In this specific case, FF3/6 is the same game. 6 was the third game to be localized in English, so on the SNES it was sold as FF3.

          • thecrotch@sh.itjust.works
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            By the time the DS rolled around they were calling it 6 everywhere. This person played the Japanese 3. Also a great game btw.

    • DrMango@lemmy.world
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      9 months ago

      The OP is intended to describe FF7 but tbh it also applies to 13, 12, 10 (although you’re taking down megareligion instead of megacorporation), and possibly also 8 and 9 which I haven’t played but have confirmed with light research that there are furries

      • Rodeo@lemmy.ca
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        I don’t recall any furries in 7.

        There is a talking tiger thing, but it is not anthropomorphic, it’s just a big cat that can talk.

        There’s also Cait Sith, which is a talking stuffed animal that I believe is actually a robot controlled by a human remotely. But also not really a furry.

      • Donjuanme@lemmy.world
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        9 months ago

        8 didn’t have “furries” though. It barely had non human interactions (outside of combat, but still no anthropomorphic enemies), there were a few “guardians” that had human-esque shape, but they weren’t interacted with or relevant to the story (outside of this one detail). I would highly recommend it, but I definitely understand how it isn’t appealing in it’s age. The enemy->card->item->magic->stats->enemy murder circle was very innovative

  • TheObviousSolution@lemm.ee
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    9 months ago

    Woke was never a new concept, it’s just a new word that people use so they don’t have to admit those aspects of themselves they can’t really defend and don’t want to admit. It’s basically a misdirection tactic to shift the discussion back onto their critics without admitting the problem they really have with something.

  • Flumpkin@slrpnk.net
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    9 months ago

    Many of these story lines in movies and games still work as propaganda that functions “pro corporation”:

    A lot of the problems and evil is caused by rules of the system that create emergent behavior. E.g. the rules of capitalism create greedy corporations and lobbying to subvert democracy and funding to create and spread ideology to justify all this.

    But a good story needs a villain not some abstract concept with complex problems and solutions. So even “politically critical” stories focus on some corrupt politician or senator or rogue government agency. Once they are defeated or unmasked the good newspapers and governments fix the problem. But that is really a fantasy.

    This is more prevalent for movies since games mostly have post-apocalypse settings. But it’s still a focus on individual evil instead of the soft unfathomable evil of systems and rules creating evil or ineffective institutions.

    • Agent641@lemmy.world
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      9 months ago

      Abes Oddysey is straight up anti-capitalist, anti-consumerist eco-anarchy.

      Not that there’s anything wrong with that.

      • PugJesus@kbin.socialOP
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        9 months ago

        What do you mean? Clearly it’s a completely apolitical tale about corporate greed both literally and metaphorically cannibalizing the world in pursuit of fleeting and ultimately diminishing profits, leaving nothing behind but bones and waste?

    • NigelFrobisher@aussie.zone
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      9 months ago

      It’s absolutely wild how many movie and game stories in our lifetime have had a villain who’s trying to save the world through imposed means, and the heroes are like, “you kind of have a point, but individual choice is more important”. Which is not dissimilar to what the oil companies’ spin says on how consumer choice is what matters - The wheels of communism must keep turning.

      Meanwhile, in The Day The Earth Stood Still, the aliens’ message is “stop this shit, or we’ll stop you”.

  • KuroeNekoDemon@sh.itjust.works
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    9 months ago

    Final Fantasy 6 also has the same type of plotline except instead of an evil corporation it’s an evil empire and sociopathic clown (Kefka). This game was released on the SNES btw with Chrono Trigger. Do I dare mention Final Fantasy 9? Btw before people ask FF6 was my childhood and I loved that game that’s how I know it from the inside out