I wish cows were the size of cats so we could have them as pets - eviltoast
  • Susaga@sh.itjust.works
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    3 months ago

    Granted. Intense selective breeding creates a dwarf cow to sell as designer pets. The process is excessively cruel and incestuous, and the dwarf cows are in constant pain, as well as stupid and easily angered. Animal rights groups see the creation of dwarf cows as more inhumane than beef production.

  • sporks_a_plenty@lemmy.world
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    3 months ago

    Granted. They are immediately more endearing than any pet anyone has ever had… But by 3 years of age they are more delicious than any food anyone has ever eaten.

  • Che Banana@beehaw.org
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    3 months ago

    Granted.

    Mini-Cows will never become house trained so you become accostomed to a warm-squishy cow patty gushing between your toes when you walk to the bathroom late at night.

  • Klear@sh.itjust.works
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    3 months ago

    Granted. A startup called InGen starts producing them and as an early adopter, you’re invited to their soon to be open island resort.

  • Pixel@lemmy.sdf.org
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    2 months ago

    Granted. Now noone can get a decent burger or steak cus there’s not enough beef.

    wow I am late to the party

  • kitnaht@lemmy.world
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    3 months ago

    Then buy some cows, breed them, and selectively breed them until they’re really small. But don’t forget about secondary characteristics like aggressiveness, etc. Don’t breed them to be a smash-faced pug with breathing problems.

    • Troy@lemmy.ca
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      3 months ago

      Op accidentally starts a cattle ranch in process of acquiring house pet. Not enough generations of cows pass, and they die as a farmer.

    • baltakatei@sopuli.xyz
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      3 months ago

      Better hurry, though, since culture might change and suddenly domesticated animals like cows are recognized as people with rights and 20th century burger-eating culture becomes taboo.

  • RandomVideos@programming.dev
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    3 months ago

    Granted, now cows, along with every other animal on earth, will become the size of cats

    Good luck keeping something the same size of you as a pet and surviving all the insects that are now huge