what's a polite way to reject a picture with a very thankful patient who was under your care? - eviltoast

I have a problem with establishing boundaries.

I’m a private person. That’s very often misinterpreted as being arrogant and feeling superior to others. I’m not, I just wish to be left alone, but people still feel disrespected and it’s tiring to be constantly explaining yourself. And I don’t understand why I have to explain myself constantly.

This very emotional and thankful patient wanted a picture with me and I stupidly agreed. He also wanted my phone number (I gave him a false one) to invite me to have lunch, as he celebrated his 70th birthday. I don’t believe it was sexual or romantic, because he is married, his wife was there when he extended the invitation and took the picture and he also wanted to invite the whole unit.

I acted like this because it was the easiest way to get him to leave the hospital and free the room but also because I didn’t want to cause a scene.

What could I do next time?

  • jerkface@lemmy.caEnglish
    75·
    3 months ago

    Not respecting my privacy is incredibly disrespectful and mean.

    You are wildly overstating it. Do you file a grievance every time the bank records your image? Privacy is not a right. You DID associate with the man, you DID socialize with the man, but you are so set against him recording the event that you consider it “incredibly disrespectful and mean?” Dude, that is a YOU thing.

    • lud@lemm.ee
      52·
      3 months ago

      No, it’s disrespectful to not respect my wish.

      If one can’t respect a simple “no thanks”, fuck em.

      • jerkface@lemmy.caEnglish
        23·
        3 months ago

        It’s a little rude. That’s it. Nobody needs your permission to take your photo. They are doing you a social courtesy to ask at all. You deal with it with infinite grace when a corporation takes your photo. You can tamp down your umbrage a wee bit, I think, when someone you have a personal relationship with requests the same grace. Yes, it’s a little rude. No, it’s not “incredibly disrespectful and mean.”

        • lud@lemm.ee
          3·
          3 months ago

          They don’t need permission to take a photo of me, but they obviously do need permission to take a photo with me.

          There is a huge difference there Jerkface.

          • jerkface@lemmy.caEnglish
            11·
            3 months ago

            I mean, it’s easier if you cooperate, but clearly they don’t need your permission if they are quicker or smarter than you.

        • 14th_cylon@lemm.ee
          1·
          3 months ago

          It’s a little rude.

          No it is not. What is rude and weird and creepy is your idea that people have obligation to take a photo with you.

          They are doing you a social courtesy to ask at all.

          Oh my. You must be chairman of your local incel club, huh?

    • 14th_cylon@lemm.ee
      2·
      3 months ago

      You DID associate with the man, you DID socialize with the man

      She did neither of these things. She rendered some services in a professional setting.

      When I work in the store and sell you new shoes, I also “did not socialize with you” and it gives you absolutely no right to my privacy.