no, actually just better customer service

Hey friend! I also slowly did this. I dont regret taking the years to figure it out and try things. From like 19 to 24 I just thought i liked femme stuff sometimes. met my wife, who affirmed my feelings for the first time ever, but she wanted a bf so we dated cishet for 2 years. then i became a femboy ((egg)) and there were signs before that for her. she was always supportive without outwardly telling me, i never thought to ask. i thought i was just doing my regular atrange femme guy stuff. WRONG. dysphoria started hitting like a train around 28 to 30 then i just started HRT with zero inout from her because i was scared. i didnt know she supported me already. she sometimes aligned with TERFs and i thought it would end the marriage.

our marriage only got better, went poly, both rather happy because we enjoy each other fully. she likes how i gained a lot of emotion and we express feelings a lot more together. another poster said “living with a teenage girl” yeah… HRT did that to me too lol

my wife was cis het, but now ids as queer. she still only prefers men, but we still have a great relationship 😉 i get to be an exception.

thank you bayes 😘

about 1 year in, estradiol valerate 0.2 mL im weekly, Spironalactone 2x daily, started progesterone about 9 months in.

it wasn’t long before i felt tenderness in my breasts, maybe 6 weeks. grew to B cups then progesterone has really made them fill out more and still gaining, on the light side of C currently. i decided to weight cycle using cheese (i love cheese) and that worked out pretty well, i gained about 30 lbs permanently (in all my favorite places).

i also decided to really try to eat healthy other than being a cheese monster, went mostly vegetarian and worked out about 2x or 3x weekly just legs and core.

I started a bit later in life, at 31 but I identify as NB so its fine. I do still get a lot of confusion though I like being able to tone it up or down with clothes as a determining factor.

People treat me differently now, in good ways and bad ways. I am about 1000% more emotional, for better and for worse. I personally love that i get upset enough that i can cry over dumb stuff like missing someone or being TOO HAPPY. The crying got much worse with progesterone, but it isn’t a lasting sadness, it’s acute. to the point that I’ll be crying and logically know that there’s nothing to feel that strongly about, but the physical reaction happens anyways. my wife thinks it’s been really therapeutic for me, probably euphoria related mostly.

uhhh what else, idk but it was a great choice. take your time, hang out with people that actually care about you and don’t waste time on anyone that brings you down.

i am nonbinary, i prefer she/her but i use transfem and/or AMAB on my dating profiles because it is very helpful to who contacts me. also, i still dont put much thought into it. my contact with people who have thought about people that have discussed this with me are all on this thread right now. so, thanks fpr the opinions. I’ll consider ceasing usage of AMAB, but i like to express to men that i am different. its only because language is slippery, and my local culture that i use these terms. i’m in the south with not that many trans folks nearby.

usually my thing is if i want to vibe then they should just respect my pronouns. if its a random person, i could care less. people that i want to date, i try to indicate that im transfem because I’ll be honest, they care a lot about whether I’m going to be “femme” in some sense and they need to know to ask about what gender affirming care ive done, and i dont find that offensive.

love to yap, thanks for introducing this topic to me!

more women want to date me now because i present as a femboy. it’s hilarious, but understandable. they feel safer around me generally and appreciate makeup/style choices and my higher attention on emotions which i learned through the queer community.

cats are devastating to local ecosystems. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cat_predation_on_wildlife

Hey! I wanted to weigh in about this because I did experience what others might call “increased attraction to men”. I was already dabbling and at least bi, but hetero romantic. always was with women but this change deliberately coincided with me trying out men and being more comfortable with being pansexual. I’m still with my wife, find her even more attractive because she still loves me and supports me! but i do enjoy men a lot more now too, but i think that was always there and i was repressing it to fit social expectations. that changed with HRT because i was subverting multiple expectations at the same time, like i gave up trying to mask.

i like you, youre funny and smort

It’s great that you get to discuss it! Don’t hold anxiety because of some emotions he has that you cannot control. It’s also possible for it to get worse, so move forward with people that are happy with you. Spend your time and effort almost entirely on the people that you know care. He will come around on his own time; or not. It speaks volumes to what he cares about in the relationship with you if that essential part of you is nonexistent to him. I’m going through something similar, and I think a lot of trans folx do.

:3

I think about it like that too, which led to a poly situation. And I just don’t find many cis men that I’m interested in. They are all bi/pan.

I have a wife, who is a bottom we are “anchors” for each other. I would recommend finding an anchor, even if you both have to take turns using hands or toys… as you said you only really emotionally connect with feminine folks, maybe you can find another person that feels the same way, they are plentiful imo.

We have a BF who tops women and not me :( I do get his hands and not much else :) but he is a lovely person that like cuddles me a bunch and kisses, literally every other thing romantically and helps me garden and stuff.

I have a solo partner to satisfy mostly sexual needs and that’s all they really want too. That’s my FWB, but we are still pretty new to each other.

Toys exist, someone has to do the fun parts for the other person. I’m certain you can get exactly what you want if you put yourself out there and also work on yourself. Just keep grinding ;) and it’ll happen. Being near a city or going to events in a city really helps, I would suggest a slosh personally.

Love, deviantfemboi (31 nb all)

Hey OP! I transitioned later in life, early 30s and people only really noticed after about 1 year. I never changed my pronouns at work and have never mentioned it or confirmed/denied anything. You don’t owe people any explanation. You do owe yourself this, if it’s what you really want. Do not let your “career” stop you from being who you want to be for years, that’s just my conclusion. I’m gonna die soon, and like waiting for some nebulous time in the future when my transition would be perfect would be playing into their game. Screw them, and their norms. We are gonna show people that you can do this, be a kind soul, and still crush work. I just back off on the social things like I still go by masc. pronouns at work and dress masc, even with tits lol. I just wear sports bras and use the men’s room still.

Best of luck! My advice: don’t wait

After 1 year, not out officially. They both pointed out some physical changes and have not pressed the issue when i was a brick wall about the topic. They used to both make crude anti-queer jokes occasionally and that kinda stopped… My friends that I consider family are incredibly supportive! One day I might come out to my parents, but I don’t feel like I owe it to them and I just don’t like them much for about a decade now so it’s not a huge loss!

i_O is lovely