It’s been so long man. But damn I had to struggle, and I am at a better place now. Still a student, but I have grown a lot. Bless you for helping me at a vulnerable time. It still hurts sometime, but I know I have made a lot of progress in positive things.

That first paragraph was a great explanation. Thank you for that perspective there.

It’s kind of weird that first relationships rarely do work out. It’s only the third day now so maybe I should let time do its thing. This will only make me stronger but this does make me afraid of having a relationship in the future! Will not touch any drugs, thanks.

Thanks mate. I’m not heartbroken, but the thing is I HAVE NO FEELINGS AT ALL. If anything I feel glad that I found out she had a bf and blocked her, instead of staying with her not knowing about it. In all honesty. I’m just bored and tired that the relationship occupies my mental resources. There’s nothing else to think of when I’m not actively doing something. You’re right, it feels like I lost the future and now I’m not sure what it feels like to be single. I’m carrying on with my studies but when I’m not studying or watching youtube I find myself thinking of the relationship and I have to force myself to do something I can’t just sit and not be bored.

I used to think of calculus and mathematical problems all the time when i was single, I solved all of those complicated problems by now. Now I have nothing to think of at all. I know this doesn’t seem a reply to your post, and thank you for your advice, but the major issue isn’t heartbreak anymore - more so the unproductivity and boredom on my head that keeps lingering.

You say getting under someone else helps… that’s a good idea, but how can I find solace in myself at the moment? I don’t want to be with someone just because I can’t deal with this myself. Thank you.