+1 to the feeling overall in this post. I am very cognizant of the game, and how it’s rigged against 99% of people, and I’m tired. But as soon as I try and mention this to people who inquire why I’m always so tired, they immediately come back with “you’re just depressed!”. Well, yeah maybe, but how can one not be in these TrYiNg TiMeS. I try to make the best of every day, and taking moment to be thankful for what I have both big and small. Sending sympathies and caring vibes in your direction. I hope that the clouds clear soon for you! :)

Same problem here! I’ve been doing my own self discovery via introspection. I started a list on my phone literally called “shit I don’t like” and have built it up from there.

I started with “windy days” and put it in my phone. Mulled it over a few more days and I could expand and reflect. I connected the dots, so to speak, about other things I don’t like…hair dryers, fans pointing directly at me, vacuums, hair in my face, blenders. The grouping of these things can be given broader labels that are more overarching such as “loud bursts of noises” (too much audio stimuli), and “wind propulsion at/near me” (too much physical stimuli).

Took me a few months to build up a substantial list; and I’m still adding things every few weeks as I experience the world around me now more aware of “me” in the world.

Hi! Late to the party sorry.

I have gone through this, and similarly to what others say, I was able to pin point it to autism burnout. It’s a very steep climb out of the hole, and I wish you the best of luck.

Some things that have helped me in my journey:

• Whenever I am having a moment, using this site to figure out why and what I need: https://youfeellikeshit.com/index.html
• Therapy, specifically someone who is knowledgeable about autism and autism burnout
• Reading as much as I can about autism burnout and how it manifests (it can take months to years to dig yourself out)
• A good book, specifically around keeping house and chores, that has helped me a lot: How to Keep House While Drowning
• If you have the financial means, hiring help to take care of the things taking up space in your brain such as cleaning, food prep, and maybe even taking a leave for a while

• My pattern recognition is off the charts. I can’t explain it very well as I don’t know “how” I do it, but I often know what went wrong and where which lends well to the job that I do. I’m that person going to IT/dev teams like, “you gotta trust me bro”, and I don’t think I’ve been wrong yet at my current job (knock on wood). Beyond work it is very helpful as well.

• Super visual memory. If I’ve been there once, I remember it, not an elaboration. Even locations that have changed with time, or it’s been years since my last visit. I can’t wayfind using names of streets but I can visually guide myself. I can visually picture myself walking through malls to locate the exact location of stores, shelves, items on the shelves. An extreme super power to min/max my outdoor time spent. It’s also kind of fun watching YouTubers I like and then randomly spotting something mundane in the background and knowing exactly where they are; and pulling it up on Google maps to prove it to people in the room who doubt my abilities.

• Similarly to the above, if I’ve read it, I know where it is. My mom has an actual photographic memory so she remembers the facts and where she read them. I only got half of that, and remember where I read it (on the page). It’s more helpful than it seems, especially when you remember a vague fact and you pull the book out to the exact page to reconfirm your knowledge or use a direct quote in a paper. I do also remember the information/facts but not as exact as photographic memory/special interest peeps; but much better than the average person so I can still wow people with random trivia.

• Finding alternative solutions to problems. The problem is still resolved, just maybe not using the most “obvious” solution. Very unfortunately, I had a job interview for a PM(?) role in which that they used 3 brain teasers to evaluate my performance for the position (ugh, I know). I ended up solving all 3 teasers, but just not in the way that was intended or matched the “correct answer” on Google. I didn’t get the role, but jokes on them, I think that being able to think of our of the box solutions to problems is actually more beneficial for a PM(?) role than a cookie cutter answer!

• Some overlap with other people in the thread: Musical inclination, autopiloting/good in medical emergencies, following instructions apparently (+1 on the general mood of this lol) and by extension writing instructions.

I’ve got a similar power, maybe a step lower than yours. I managed to complete and compete in higher levels of orchestra band without actually learning how to read music. I would be able to play the song after hearing it a few times. I use sheet music as an instruction (if needed) on which notes to play (this note equals this fingering on the instrument) rather than speed/tempo of the song. Applies to whistling/singing too.

And very similarly the on the fly ad-libs which makes for some funny “jokes” I can throw around with friends as I’m not very good with actual jokes.

I would love to hear perspectives from non-Australian people as well! Currently in Canada and wondering the same thing; but I am also hoping to compile this information so I can better advocate and highlight issues to my peers for fellow autistic people in their countries.

A selection:

• No food could touch. I would eat the hot dog and bun separately and eat the ketchup with a spoon. Pizza was the same: pile the pineapples, ham, cheese, spoon the sauce, and have the dough on the side. Of course all of them to be eaten in a certain order. The only reason why I have stopped now is due to the time it takes plus the odd looks.

• As others have said, innate sense of justice and fairness with an attachment to rules.

• Asking my mom how kids can play with each other on the playground. She gave me a script to use to introduce myself to other kids and ask to play with them. I was almost a teen when I stopped using this and it was only because it was the first time the script didn’t work and I was devastated.

• Similarly, asking my mom how to “wave arms while walking”. Is it 45° angles back and forth? Same or opposite the legs? Elbows first for a sway or stiff arms?

• Obsessively stacking and organizing objects as “play”. Creamers in the basket at a diner, toys in a circle around me, trinkets in a row.

• New media meant new characters to copy into my personality. From mannerisms to straight up copying the dialogue from the movie; I was a chameleon.

• Pattern recognition is unparalleled to other in my grades. Still to this day, it’s one of the traits that puts me ahead.

• Flip flopping between “a joy to have in my class; my favourite student” for one teacher to “lacking in (basic neurotipical trait here), has a long way to go” for another teacher.