PositiveNoise

You: Whatcha doin Whiskers?
Cat: …I am taking orders from Sauron… <mumble mumble>
You: Oh, that’s a fly! cool :)
Cat: …soon I will bite. Yes. soon… <mumble mumble>

Bite Them! You need no reason. Just Bite TEHM!

spoiler: it feels like an alarm clock made of half melted jello

rule 1 of bathroom club : do NOT talk about Final Step

Hmm. A bit of stretching might feel nice. Work that leg! Oh, and napping! Napping is super great. This is awesome. I think I’ll just hang here and wait for Miss Servant to bring me some noms (presumably).

That expression: “YES! This is IT! I’ve achieved it!” good kitty

mmm…unconscious nonsense…that hits the spot. Its like coffee for the soul!

nom nom nom. Oh, this emptiness in my soul… nom nom nom… wears me down so, I …nom nom nom… can hardly bear this …nom nom nom…

Lovely

I hear the sound of a thousand tiny Unicorns, lightly clapping in support. Sounds like coconuts. Tiny coconuts.

Stop touching the plug, Cowbee. I fear this is above your pay grade.

Damn it, Susan! Can’t you just be satisfied by hunting mice, like normal people?

Florals, indeed! The shirts I always wear when I’m ready to attract some bees.

<side eye glance>

“Methinks a cheddar we doth encounter.”
“For us?”
“Surely for us. Surely”