Now that I’m in my thirties I no longer have to (can) jump

Warning? How about a beacon of hope!

Uh-oh, time to kill 15,000 more civilians

Most of us are childless adults because of republican policies.

Dexif

She was a fucking DA, ain’t nobody wanna debate with her, especially a half brained real-estate broker

He usually initiates the conversation, informing me he spotted a racoon in the back yard

I’m a childless cat dude, can I join?

I love the verbal visualization;

A million seconds is 12 days. A billion seconds is 31 years. A trillion seconds is 31,688 years.

I was laid off several several months ago, am kinda glad now

America’s stance has been “fuck the working class” since the 80’s at this point I’d love to see anyone try

Passively informed is an understatement, also we’re supposed to be available to work at a moments call, with limited time off availability. Am I gonna just tell my boss I’m leaving early to go vote?

Ah fuck, that’s more terrifying than I’d imagined!

I’m more concerned about the indestructible glockroach!

Yea, been doing this for the last 20 years, we must be close

How many windows updates have bricked PC’s over the years?

“It’s about that time I realized it wasn’t a Meme at all, it was the loch Ness monsta!”

Wait, polls were useful before?

Let’s make Bill Nye the head if the EPA while we’re at it!

I’m a pastor who rails on the demonic music of today.