It's vitally important that we restrict the rights of trans people in order to protect them from transphobic trolls /s - eviltoast

Satirical rant incoming:

We all know that transphobic trolls are pretending to be trans in order to make trans people look bad and take away their rights. Therefore, as trans allies, it is our duty to restrict the rights of trans people so that trolls can’t use it.

Trans people deserve to identify as whatever gender they so choose. Lately, transphobic trolls have been abusing that right, by pretending to have nonsense genders that make no sense. In order to safeguard our community from trolls and protect the rights of trans people, we must therefore treat any supposedly “trans” person with a nonsense gender with suspicion, in case they’re a troll.

Oh, and pronouns? Pronouns are vitally important! Any trans person absolutely deserves to be referred to with whatever pronouns make them feel comfortable. That’s why it’s essential for us to immediately ban the use of neopronouns, which transphobic trolls have been using to make us realise that we hate neopronoun users.

Remember: We’re oppressing trans people because we’re allies!

/non-sarcastic: What the hell is up with people who say this kind of thing?