Over the course of several years I’ve discovered that I’ve grown more paranoid and fearful when living with my neurotypical family as they haven’t been emotionally supportive in the slightest.
They always compain that I never tell them anything but can I really be blamed for this when I get criticised about complaining?
I feel more comfortable around my friends as I get to listen to their IRL horror stories and I can also share mine, since I’m an empath I’m more emotionally invested in listening to people. With my friends it’s a beneficial give and take whereas I’m only given the choice of listening with my family so I feel like I’m constantly taking crazy pills.
I remember after consulting with my doctor I got diagnosed and I was told that yeah I do have OCD. I tried telling my parents about it and they said it’s all in my head. Gods that dreadful feeling hasn’t dimished in the slightest.
Trying to find a tech job hasn’t been easy as well being a new graduate with no prior experience as well. So trying to create useful/interesting FOSS apps has been hard as my motivation has mainly stemmed from my desire to escape.
Everyday I wonder if my life could have been better if I was born neurotypical.
Sorry for the rambling, please let me know if this post is unwanted here
Crappy “family” bits feel very familiar v.v Mine always insisted that doctors are all quacks and the psych docs are the quackiest. They even seemed offended when I took a sociology elective 🙄 A few days ago was the six month anniversary of me coming to this house ( 😅 !) and I’m still learning how to live with people who aren’t constantly suffocating, crushing, bleeding the life out of me.
Sorry I don’t think I’ve got any help for you, but maybe some commiseration is nice 🤷 😅 😕 I wish you luck getting into a healthier life!
OOF :/
my condolences
Power to you✊
I can understand, sometimes it’s hard to give friends advice when they’re in a difficult spot so no worries and thank you for your kind words🤗
I hope things get better for you as well!~🌻🍀