things you can only do with boys - eviltoast
  • nomous@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    4
    arrow-down
    1
    ·
    edit-2
    6 months ago

    Psychology isn’t based on your bets.

    Spoken like someone who’s never been in therapy or studied psychology, people bet and guess and infer stuff all the time; it’s a “soft” science for a reason.

    That means no baby pictures at all.

    Specifically pictures of their genitals, I feel like no baby genital pics is a good default, yes, what a weird hill to die on.

    You have no evidence of this trauma.

    Absence of evidence is not evidence of absence

    You’re just guessing.

    Guessing, inferring, surmising, call it whatever helps you sleep at night. I think of it as erring on the side of safety and respect for my kids. Not having pics of their junk doesn’t make my life any worse, there’s only downsides for them.

    • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      2
      arrow-down
      3
      ·
      edit-2
      6 months ago

      Again, babies don’t come out with clothes on. The idea of expecting consent for sending grandparents pictures of what their newborn grandchild looked like when it was just a few seconds old is ridiculous.

      And yes, psychology is a soft science. That doesn’t mean that you personally can claim that people have been traumatized by this without showing any evidence of it just like you can’t claim that people have been traumatized by a Luke Skywalker action figure without showing any evidence of it. You can infer whatever you like. Inferences aren’t truth and they are based on personal biases.

      Suggesting that because psychology is a soft science, you can make whatever claim about trauma you infer is ridiculous. Where did you get your psychology degree from, anyway?

      • nomous@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        3
        arrow-down
        1
        ·
        6 months ago

        We’re talking about pictures of your kids genitals. What a weird fucking hill to die on. Its your kid, take all the pics you want, probably don’t get caught with them on your phone.

        It’s ok to just say “you know what you might have a point” and walk away sometimes my dude.

        • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          2
          arrow-down
          2
          ·
          6 months ago

          And yet I don’t think you do have a point without evidence, so I’m not sure why I’d say that.

          Again, where did you get your psychology degree from?

          Its your kid, take all the pics you want, probably don’t get caught with them on your phone.

          I’m sorry… do you think it’s illegal to have a photo of a naked baby on your phone?

          • nomous@lemmy.world
            link
            fedilink
            arrow-up
            2
            ·
            edit-2
            6 months ago

            And yet I don’t think you do have a point without evidence,

            My point is childhood trauma takes a lot of forms and “good natured” showing naked pictures of your children to potential romantic partners the first time they visit (the thing we were talking about) is undoubtedly traumatic for a portion that experience it. I’m not aware of any specific studies studying the impact of showing nude photos of your children to their potential romantic suitors but I do know that childhood trauma has been studied and has far-reaching, unknown impacts. Even if the victim often doesn’t recognize the instance as abuse until much later in life, if ever.

            https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/understanding-ptsd/202206/how-childhood-shame-can-affect-our-adult-relationships

            https://psychcentral.com/blog/psychology-self/2018/09/childhood-toxic-shame

            https://mind.help/news/childhood-humiliation-can-leave-lifelong-scars-warn-mental-health-experts/

            Again, where do you get your psychology degree from?

            I was about halfway through a sociology degree (admittedly as a pretty subpar state university) before I transferred to CS. What’d you study?

            I’m sorry… do you think it’s illegal to have a photo of a naked baby on your phone?

            They’re not something I’d want on my phone obviously.

            • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
              link
              fedilink
              arrow-up
              1
              arrow-down
              1
              ·
              6 months ago

              Sorry… you’re saying a baby feels trauma and shame when it has its picture taken and that leads to psychological problems as an adult and creates more trauma when you show that photo to their partner?

              Also, virtually every new parent has photos of their baby naked on their phone. And it’s legal. I have no idea why you don’t think it would be. A nude picture of your own baby is not child porn. No one has ever been put on a sex offender list for having a picture of their child just after it exited the womb on their phone. What a silly thing to say.

              • nomous@lemmy.world
                link
                fedilink
                arrow-up
                4
                ·
                edit-2
                6 months ago

                you’re saying a baby feels trauma and shame when it has its picture taken and that leads to psychological problems as an adult and creates more trauma when you show that photo to their partner?

                You’re being willfully obtuse. The trauma and shame comes from the picture being displayed for the parents amusement to potential romantic partners the first time they come over, presumably in their early teens.

                virtually every new parent has photos of their baby naked on their phone.

                Most I’ve seen are completely swaddled and only their little faces are visible.

                And it’s legal.

                Where did you get your law degree?

                I have no idea why you don’t think it would be. A nude picture of your own baby is not child porn.

                I mean, I personally agree with that.

                No one has ever been put on a sex offender list for having a picture of their child just after it exited the womb on their phone.

                Crazier shit has happened and we’re not talking about gross little bloody newborns fresh out of the box. In every baby pic I’ve ever seen (and in the context of this comic); they’re bath pics, specifically ones with their junk in it! It’s weird, just place some bubbles or a wash cloth strategically or something it’s not that difficult fuck.

                  • nomous@lemmy.world
                    link
                    fedilink
                    arrow-up
                    3
                    ·
                    6 months ago

                    Evidence?

                    Was the focal point of the photo on the child’s genitalia or pubic area?

                    “It seemed to be.”

                    “Was the child who is depicted in an unnatural pose, or in inappropriate attire, given the age of the child?”

                    “They were naked.”

                    “Was the child nude or fully or partially clothed?”

                    “Completely nude your honor.”

                    That’s how quickly that can be used against you and I for one don’t have that kind of faith in our legal system.

                    Look, it’s your kid you do whatever you want, we could argue back and forth all day, I’m sure you’re a decent parent and handle things as appropriately as possible but for anyone else reading this maybe give some consideration to pictures you take of your vulnerable kids and what purpose those pictures serve, some strategic bubbles or a cloth make the picture 100% innocent and it becomes a non-issue.

                • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
                  link
                  fedilink
                  arrow-up
                  1
                  arrow-down
                  1
                  ·
                  6 months ago

                  It would be legal on Google Drive too. I challenge you to find me one example of a parent getting in legal trouble for having a photo of their baby naked on either their phone or on Google Drive.

                  • ulterno@lemmy.kde.social
                    link
                    fedilink
                    English
                    arrow-up
                    1
                    ·
                    6 months ago

                    Legal trouble is not the only kind of trouble.
                    I just didn’t link a news article because I thought it was widespread enough.
                    Try “guy loses google account false positive” on Google Search