You got the cheese, the ham, the... wait - eviltoast
    • sp3tr4l@lemmy.zip
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      5 months ago

      Hey, I’ll take it haha!

      Unfortunately my default joke state is basically dad jokes and puns, but my life has been so utterly absurd that I can basically just reference some insane nonsense that’s happened to me in the past somewhat indirectly, and most people just think I’m creatively making a joke.

      In seriousness, I have found that more conventional charcuterie boards are a pretty cost effective, while also decently fancy first kind of at someone’s place date, if presented well.

      I’ve done this multiple times and it has worked every time, and almost every time I’ll be told this is extremely adorable and no one has ever done this for them…

      …Then I find out, a year or two or three into the relationship, oh god, this person I love is extremely abusive, takes me for granted, and is astoundingly irresponsible.

      So I guess just hand me both of those whiskeys, neat, please.

      • Rai@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        5 months ago

        I’m a different person than who you replied to, and it’s the internet so I have no way of really telling, but yo you sound charming and fun. Also I’m sorry you had to go through that… I hope you find someone who isn’t an abuser and doesn’t suck, if you haven’t already. I’ll have a couple whiskies with ya.

        • sp3tr4l@lemmy.zip
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          5 months ago

          I appreciate the sentiment, very truly.

          Hah, my entire patriarchal lineage is massive alcoholics, so I actually drink alcohol very rarely, maybe a few times a year.

          I have managed to never get addicted to the stuff or become abusive from it, I’m basically just an absurdly lightweight drinker.

          Two whiskeys like in this pic in a row and I’d be stumbling. Two more soon after and I’d be slurring and stumbling.

          Or, the optimistic take on that is I can get a double shot of bourbon and nurse it for 4 to 6 hours and be enjoyable buzzed the whole time haha.

          Maybe someday I’ll find somebody, but right now I’m quite happy single.

          Maybe a few years go by and I’ll try again haha.

          Either way, cheers mate, probst, etc.

          • Rai@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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            5 months ago

            Ah, then I’ll have a La Croix with ya, or a NA bitters and tonic or whatnot. I do not come from a lineage of alcoholics, but since COVID my partner and I have been drinking too much, all of the time. It’s definitely something we need to fix! Two shots of whiskey like in the pic would give me a slight buzz. It’s the exactly opposite of weed for me—one small hit and I’m overthinking all of my flaws for the next couple hours.

            Much love tho.