Fellow auties, which do you find is a better and healthier fit for you: dating another autistic person or an NT? - eviltoast

I’m really confused about this. On one hand (✋), I can see how dating an autistic person would be amazing because we would just understand each other on another level. We would get each other’s emotions, meltdowns, joy, special interests, hyperfocus, communication style, etc. Also, there’s no NT partner to miss whatever NT thing we don’t bring to the relationship.

On the other hand (🤚), we definitely have some deficiencies that NTs don’t. Having an NT can help us regulate, keep us updated on social matters that we completely miss, take care of a baby that’s wailing crying, and other strengths that we just don’t have, while at the same time, we contribute with our own strengths that they don’t have.

NTs, please feel free to contribute! Your opinion and experiences are important too 🙂

I’d love to see a discussion on this topic. So what do you think?

  • Buglefingers@lemmy.world
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    8 months ago

    I believe I’ve only ever dated NTs up to this point, but I know plenty ND people. It’s a mixed bag. Everyone will bring something different to the table and you just have to find something that meshes well with you. Some of my ND friends I would not fathom living with, let alone a romantic relationship, but same could be said for some NTs.

    Someone who is understanding of you and respectful of your needs (and you theirs) is what a healthy relationship demands, that is not exclusive to NT or ND. Some people may jive better or have weaknesses covered by someone of the opposite, or of the same.