Why are so many boys and men feeling alone and in the cold? - eviltoast
  • givingsomelove@lemmy.nz
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    1 year ago

    I feel like this might be an unpopular opinion, but it’s just based on my own experience and interactions with young men. I think there’s a kind of… ‘hyper sexuality’ that has inadvertently pushed platonic intimacy to the wayside, and I think platonic intimacy is an extremely important part of socialisation. I’ve met so many young men who have such an over-sexualised view of everything, that they’re unable to have healthy platonic relationships, or even maintain ‘platonic’ components of romantic or familial relationships. Sexuality is a good thing, but I feel it is a similar problem to the prevalence of highly refined foods that can barely be considered food at all and the health impacts of that, I think there are likely mental/emotional/sexual health impacts of that ‘hyper sexuality’. The fact alone that there are men who struggle to become aroused except with some very specific, often times grotesque material says a lot. That’s of course at the far end of the spectrum, but I can only assume that there’s be similar (albeit lesser) effects all the way along. It’s like there’s a whole fridge/pantry full of delicious healthy food, but young men have had a box of Fruit Loops shoved into their hands like it’s actually enough to keep them going and help them thrive socially/emotionally/sexually.

    • Ilandar@aussie.zone
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      1 year ago

      If you don’t mind sharing, what kind of experiences and interactions are you referring to? As someone in my early 30s I find it so hard to get a read on if/how younger people have changed from when I was their age. I have been in a long-term relationship since my early 20s so haven’t interacted with anyone younger than me via dating, and all the relationships I’ve made with younger people from work/sport/gaming are too superficial to really pick up on any differences. I can’t be sure at all whether there are actually new problems developing here or if it’s just the same stuff from when I was a teenager but exacerbated (we were all obsessed with sex too). The internet has given rise to so many influencer sociopaths that can reach young people more easily than any other adult role model in their life.

      • Da Bald Eagul@feddit.nl
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        1 year ago

        I don’t have first-hand experience since I’m 18, but I imagine it’s just stuff like casual hugs or stuff like that. All physical intimacy is supposed to be for your partner now (at least in men), and as such hugging a friend would mean you’re gay and banging him.