I’ll start. Apt next door is having a cockroach infected. 4 days ago, I was playing sims on my laptop, wearing my eyeglasses. Right lens got blurry, took off, huge cockroach was crawling across inside of lens. While I was wearing them. Freak out ensued.
Firefighter? Those are the type of cockroach-condemned places that are best burnt down. I’m not kidding. Were you there to burn the place down?
It’s usually a med call for something that isn’t an emergency situation, but something ignored/abused so long that they need to see a doctor, but no one there has a car so they dial 911 for an ambulance ride.