Forgetting - eviltoast

More seriously, ADHD, among others, is a working memory disorder. A way to cover this is to use “prosthetics” for it, such as a notepad that you always carry with you. If this affects you strongly, train your muscle memory to use it to note down what you were planning to do and to refer to it when you forgot.

In PC-speak, ADHDers have traded RAM for more CPU.

    • db0@lemmy.dbzer0.comOPM
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      1 year ago

      The idea is that you can regularly check the notebook. If that doesn’t work for you, then an app with a notification might be a better match

      • Yondoza@sh.itjust.works
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        1 year ago

        I started using todoist for this and it helped a lot.

        (I’m not trying to shill this product, but I am trying to shill the idea - I’m sure there are a ton of similar products out there.)

        I use it in the “getting things done” method where you drop every little thing you need to remember in the inbox and go through the inbox once a day to organize your thoughts into whatever project or container they need to be in. It has immensely improved my life and the underlying feeling of dread that you missed or forgot to do something.

    • baronofclubs@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      I go through phases of writing things down. I do it for a week, realize I remember everything I wrote down, and get used to remembering. Then I’ll think, well, this whole thing was useless, I’m just remembering it. So I get lazy, stop writing things down, and start forgetting. Repeat ad nauseum.

      I do something similar for waking up on time. I’ll set 8 alarms in 15 minute increments. I’ll start waking up 2-3 minutes before each one, and think to myself, well this is annoying, I’m waking up on my own. So I remove most of the alarms, and then oversleep.

    • DreamButt@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      I find that the act of writing it down makes it more likely I remember it. And since I’m always writing everything down, I always know that I can reference anything. So there’s no “remembering I wrote it down,” it’s always going to be there.

    • BilboBargains@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      Writing something down increases the likelihood I will remember. It feels like there is something about listening to information that makes it difficult to remember and retain. I often forget what I was saying or lose track of what other people say in conversation.

      The process of writing may activate some other part of our minds, or that because writing is slower it becomes easier to retain in memory. Any event with a heightened emotional state becomes far easier to remember. Quite mysterious.

    • BobDaRula@lemmy.ca
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      1 year ago

      I don’t think I have adhd, but I do have pretty severe memory problems. I’ve managed to get into the habit of checking my notebook every time I think about and/or touch it. I always keep my book on my person, or with my phone so I don’t lose it

  • conditional_soup@lemm.ee
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    1 year ago

    That’s not what it feels like for me. I grew up basically getting the “what’s wrong with you? Just focus” treatment, so I always default to saying to myself “no, no, it’ll be okay, I’ll just try really super duper hard; I’m sure it’ll work this time.”

    • DarkwinDuck@feddit.de
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      1 year ago

      Yeah exactly the same experience for me. It’s not about forgetting it, it’s about thinking that if you just tried a little harder you would be able to do it. Because that’s what everyone kept telling me. And even now it feels like i’m using my ADHD as an excuse to be lazy.

  • Viking_Hippie@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    Seconded. If it wasn’t for alarm and notes apps on my phone, I’d never remember anything, let alone actually do stuff! Even paper notes wouldn’t work because I’d forget that the note existed in no time flat 😂

    • Urbanfox@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      My old boss gave me a load of shit for writing down tasks that I had to do. He just couldn’t comprehend that it wouldn’t stick if it wasn’t written down.

      He took my book from me, and then asked me to do a bunch of complicated stuff each with its own deadline.

      He then got annoyed when I didn’t do the stuff because I hadn’t written it down because he took my book.

      He got sacked, I got promoted.

      • Viking_Hippie@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        Ugh, he sounds like such an asshole! I’m glad he got sacked and belated congratulations on the promotion 😁

        • Urbanfox@lemmy.world
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          1 year ago

          Thanks! I’m now working in a new role where there is no more ridiculous pressure or wild expectations and have been able to commit to working on a degree (because I fucked up the first one).

          Work shouldn’t leave you panicking on a monday morning or crying into your lunch.

    • db0@lemmy.dbzer0.comOPM
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      1 year ago

      Individual paper notes won’t work. What’s been shown to work is a personal notebad you train yourself to carry with you always. For example by now I’ve trained myself by muscle memory to reach for my phone when getting up. Similar approach can be used for a notepad.

      • Viking_Hippie@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        Paper notepad wouldn’t work for me due to awful fine motor skills (another ADHD symptom) making my handwriting slow and cumbersome. I can write probably three times as fast on my phone where I just have to tap the letters rather than use dexterity to shape them, thus making it much less of a “stupid hand can’t keep up with my brain” kind of frustration thing.

        Plus back before smartphones were a thing, I always walked around with so much junk in my pocket that the notepad would take quite some time finding and fishing out, if it would even fit 😂

        • db0@lemmy.dbzer0.comOPM
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          1 year ago

          Of course one solution doesn’t work for everyone. if you current system works for you, keep at it. I know for me, fishing the phone out my pocket, unlocking it, opening a notepad app, opening a new note and typing it badly, is probably as slow as a notepad at least. And then due to the nature of the phone, I forgot I had notes.

        • Lawrence@mstdn.ca
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          1 year ago

          @Viking_Hippie @db0 I relate to this. I have a big bullet journal that I stopped using because it was too big to haul around all the time. So then I bought some field notes books but most of my shirts don’t have pockets and my jean pockets are filled of my phone, keys, wallet, AirPods plus I don’t want a pen in my pants pocket. On top of all of that my hand writing is atrocious and I too have the issue of my brain moving way faster than my hand.

          • Lawrence@mstdn.ca
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            1 year ago

            @Viking_Hippie @db0 I noticed the other day that my mind has what I call “branch thoughts” that sprout as related but separate thoughts to what I’m currently trying to get out of my head. These branch thoughts usually need to be explored individually but if I do that while writing, the original thought is lost. I usually stop writing down the ideas all together because it’s just too much going on at once.

    • SolarNialamide@lemm.ee
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      1 year ago

      Same. I have two alarms dedicated to just ‘washing machine’ and ‘call pharmacy’ because I will forget those every single time and end up with no clean underwear and no medication. The only problem is when I’m in a situation where I can’t immediately write something down and/or set an alarm for something, like when I’m in the shower. Then whatever I thought of will simply be lost to the void forever.

    • conditional_soup@lemm.ee
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      1 year ago

      That’s a damn good description, 4 GB of 2600 mhz ram on a 6 GHz 64 core processor and a 20gb flash disk for a hard drive.

  • LazaroFilm@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    Ha! That’s a great quote, I should write it down somewhere… nah. I’ll remember it.

    • sock@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      idk if i have adhd, i think i do but undiagnosed, i never used planners in school because i was like ill never remember to look at it and i should be able to remember what to do

      i never remember what to do

  • Danc4498@lemmy.ml
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    1 year ago

    I don’t need a notepad cause it’s ONLY 1 thing I need to remember. That is, till the next thing 5 minutes from now…

  • lazyslacker@sh.itjust.works
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    1 year ago

    I’ve been taking notes religiously at work for years. So many notes. I have gone through dozens of note pads over the years. I recently switched from paper to Microsoft To Do. Works great for my purposes since I’m on my computer most of the time anyway. No more bulky note pads with disorganized chicken scratch.

  • Stalinwolf@lemmy.ca
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    1 year ago

    My staff poke fun at me sometimes for keeping lists, but they know well by now just how close to Alzheimers I come on a daily basis.

  • uniqueid198x@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    1 year ago

    I rely on paper: a planner for ‘do thing when’ and a bullet-journaly information book. I know a lot of people like phone for this, but once I unlock the phone … I’m on lemmy. I prefer much more immediate and focused tools for myself

  • Thorny_Thicket@sopuli.xyz
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    1 year ago

    I think writing stuff down, and especially setting notifications is highly beneficial to pretty much anyone. I think it’s a great way to offload stuff from your internal brain onto external one. It’s kind of relieving when I don’t even need to try and remember something. I like to think that it frees up brain capacity for other things.

    • db0@lemmy.dbzer0.comOPM
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      1 year ago

      Like many things, whereas it’s just useful for neurotypical people, it’s essential for many people with ADHD.

  • terwn43lp@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    i know there isn’t really a simpler term but i sure hate when adhd is used as a title or adjective. it’s like saying “autistics” or “cancerers”