then he waddled away, waddle waddle…
Not all heroes wear capes.
Some wear a duck costume.
The Army would never stick you in something uncomfortable and make you do physical stuff out in the heat!
Cheap liquor and getting wasted whilst sitting on a public park bench? Sounds like Havana Syndrome to me, I should know. I suffered through it and it took a lot of money and vacations to finally feel better. Thoughts and prayers go out to this brave Recruiter, senselessly zapped by those Pesky Cubans!!!
The guy in the duck costume should’ve tried to recruit the recruiter back into the human race.
Two years later, I’d like to summarize recruiting in 2024. Today we approached a man in a full pig costume flipping a grocery store sign in 104-degree heat. The man said nothing, just flipped the sign faster than human eyes could follow. My comrades in arms are gone. All that remains of them are the stains their innards left on some cereal prices in the corner of the sign. I managed to surrender to the silent pig-beast, knowing I had nothing to offer him that could sate his hunger. He is now the governor of Ohio. I pray that it will be enough.