WASHINGTON—Calling it a no-risk investment guaranteed to appreciate in value over time, Fannie Mae officials announced Thursday that the lender had issued billions of Mortgage-backed NFTs. “This is as stable as they come, over the entire history of NFTs, they have only appreciated in value,” said CEO Hugh Frater, who noted that the collections of bundled NFTs have received a triple-A rating from every major credit agency. “We believe NFTs are the new cornerstone of American investment and savings, something that everyone should tie their retirement to if they are trying to be conservative. We’ve also sliced-and-diced stable NFTs with less secure NFTs and repackaged them to protect our investors from risk. That way, the only problem would be if the entire NFT market crashed, which we see as a total impossibility.” At press time, Fannie Mae was entering the futures market by hedging their mortgages against the future price of NFTs.