The perfect NATO soldier - eviltoast
  • sbv@sh.itjust.works
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    1 year ago

    I didn’t realize Canadians had a reputation for anger. War crimes, yes. But they are conducted in the most calm and businesslike manner possible.

    • TheMightyCanuck@sh.itjust.works
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      1 year ago

      Then you’ve never seen a hockey game, timmies drive thru, alberta rodeo, toronto traffic (omfg the road rage).

      You’d be surprised the amount of rage they got bottled up

    • Gleddified@lemmy.ca
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      1 year ago

      I think its typically up until there’s a war on, then suddenly its “Jesus Christ dude, settle down”.

      My favourite “wtf, Canada?” anecdote is during the famous WW1 Christmas peace. A group of Canadians crawled close enough to hurl canned ham into the German trenches. Once a large number of German soldiers had gathered to try to nab a can, they switched from ham to hand grenades.

        • BigDanishGuy@sh.itjust.works
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          1 year ago

          Not really the same, according to the linked wikipedia article Arone was beaten, burned and raped with broomstick. So basic torture, which is still uncreative though.

          Edit typo

          • sbv@sh.itjust.works
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            1 year ago

            IIRC the Airborne soldiers used food as bait to lure hungry kids into the compound so they attack them. Kinda like throwing tins of food into trenches.

            • BigDanishGuy@sh.itjust.works
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              1 year ago

              That’s two different incidents both in March of 1993.

              March 4th the Canadian troops stored food and water so it was visible from a public area and had a sniper set up to defend the food. Two thieves were shot several times in the back (in self defense /s) when the thieves continued to run after warning shots having been fired. One of the thieves allegedly even continued to fight while unconscious, because the killing shot was done to the back of the head at close range, so clearly also self defense. While attempting to run away one of the thieves were shot so badly that the troops could not move the body without it falling apart.

              The only real overlap between this and the ww1 incident is that food was part. But in ww1 the food was offered, seemingly as a Christmas gesture, like “here’s some food, here’s some food, here’s a grenade”, not locked up like I Somalia.

              Arone was found in a porta potty 12 days later on March 16th at an abandoned US army base. The wiki says nothing about Arone bring lured, he was just on the shitter outside the Canadian base.

              Let that be a lesson to all: don’t use abandoned toilets near Canadian army bases, because you might get water boarded, burned with a cigaret on your penis and sodomized with a broomstick, before being beaten to death.

              • sbv@sh.itjust.works
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                1 year ago

                Thanks for clearing that up, and reminding me that some of my country’s volunteers are absolute shitbags.

                • BigDanishGuy@sh.itjust.works
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                  1 year ago

                  Shitbags are all around, but in civilized countries, like your politely murderous country, they’re exposed and not covered up. That’s why we know about it.

    • C_Leviathan@sh.itjust.works
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      1 year ago

      If you know anything about Canadians in the world wars you know what hardcore soldiers they can be. Apparently the Canadians and Australians were the only soldiers known to routinely laugh and joke on their way to get bulldozed en masse on the western front.

  • BigDanishGuy@sh.itjust.works
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    1 year ago

    OBJECTION! Norway is just a colonial province of Denmark, which, for tax purposes only, appear to be a separate country, thus I must demand that Danes be recognized as both sober and discreet.

    • Bronzie@sh.itjust.works
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      1 year ago

      There was a vote in a Danish newspaper a few years ago about what to call us.
      I think “Fjellaber” won. Mountain monkeys for the rest of you.

      We did a separate vote in a Norwegian newspaper shortly after. The answer “Being danish is embarrassing enough” won by a landslide.

      Just a little fun fact to brighten up everyone but @BigDanishGuy’s weekend!

      • BigDanishGuy@sh.itjust.works
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        1 year ago

        That’s “fjeldaber” with a silent “d” because of… Well I don’t know why, it’s fancier with silent letters, sorta like French.

        TBH Norwegian pronounciation is a bit simpler, do you even have silent letters? Kinda sounds like a west Jutlandian drunk.

        One thing that bothers me though, is how you decline your nouns. What I mean is the phrase “Den bilen” is silly. The noun is “bil”, if we’re specific we go “bilen” were the English would go “the car”, we can all agree on that. But “that car”? Why do you need both a “den” and a “-en”? “-en” is a pleonasm, we already know it’s that car and not those cars, you don’t need to tell me that were only discussing a single car…

        And don’t get me started on the word “slike”, having had to read Sentralnervesystemet by Per Brodal made me really confused, I mean why did he mention candy all the time in an anatomy text book?

        • Bronzie@sh.itjust.works
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          1 year ago

          Yeah lots of silent letters.
          My name even has one.

          For your question regarding the use of “den bilen”: we use do it to confuse the Swedes. As you probably know, they are not the brightest bunch. I’m glad we caught a Dane too.

          • BigDanishGuy@sh.itjust.works
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            1 year ago

            I can’t shit on Norwegians today, not on July 22nd. Truth be told, we wept with you.

            But going after the Swedes though, that’s fair game. Had Sweden been a member when the poster was made I’d bet it’d say “unpretentious as a Swede”.

  • erin@lemmy.sidh.bzh
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    1 year ago

    Thanks to De Gaulle, “Humble” is not the word I would use to describe us, the French nation 🤣 .

      • MadSurgeon@sh.itjust.works
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        1 year ago

        Isn’t American doctrine incredibly flexible? Maybe our rules of engagement are fairly strict, but commanders have a lot of choice in how they achieve objectives.

        • adriaan@sh.itjust.works
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          1 year ago

          Inflexibility is more a stereotype of Americans in general than of American soldiers, also these stereotypes are from quite a while ago so they have shifted

    • BigDanishGuy@sh.itjust.works
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      1 year ago

      The are many words that I would use to describe the French, some more flattering than others, but humble would definitely not be among them.